Well. Twenty-one since last Sunday. I think there have been birthdays where I felt different the day it happened: the eighteenth, and the twentieth. But this one seems to bear no significance whatsoever. Which is fine by me because I tend to freak out easily about getting older. My parents came down to Maastricht to see me which amounted to a perfect birthday. I’m not one for the parties these days. We visited the American War Cemetery outside the city and the old Neercanne Castle right on the Belgium border, we dined out at the best fish restaurant in town, we did a lot of walking around in the brisk fall sunlight. Seriously: perfection. Of course, a war cemetery may seem like something rather odd to be visiting for a birthday but it’s such a calm, peaceful place, and my parents had never been. There are no words to describe the feeling of looking over that sea of just about 10,000 white crosses, and knowing that these Americans and countless more died because of our country’s fucked-up past. There’s a tall memorial tower on the cemetery with a chapel inside. On one of its outside walls it reads, EACH FOR HIS OWN MEMORIAL / EARNED PRAISE THAT WILL NEVER DIE / AND WITH IT / THE GRANDEST OF ALL SEPULCHRES / NOT THAT IN WHICH / HIS MORTAL BONES ARE LAID / BUT A HOME / IN THE MINDS OF MEN. I tear up every time I read that.

My host mom Andrea sent me the sweetest birthday email ever which included such heartwarming little notes as: Kennedy’s yelling out, “I miss you, Kati!” and We miss you bunches & wish you were here! Please, come back when you can!!! So. Flights from Frankfurt to Charlotte to Cincinnati currently go for 650 euros ($960). I’ve been putting aside some money for a couple of months now; it’s sitting in a little box in the top drawer of my nightstand (in case you plan on robbing me). It feels good that I actually stuck to my plan of saving money for Kentucky In Twenty-Ten. In all honesty, I’m not at all confident that this will happen in 2010 because right now there’s too much uni shit going on for me to even think straight but I will still keep saving up, and then I guess make a spontaneous decision some time next year? It sure feels good, though, to know that my KY gang will welcome me into their home anytime I want to!

I also got two surprising birthday emails. One from my wonderful friend Linn from Norway. As you may recall, we met in Kentucky as two lost exchange students and became great friends. But we haven’t seen each other since, and only stay in contact through Facebook. Her email was so unexpected, and it definitely made me smile. The other one was far more surprising. It was from my old high school friend Nina. She’s the best person; I really don’t know how else to put it. We haven’t talked in forever but she suggested we meet when I come home for Christmas and catch up which made me really, really happy. Heh.

What else. I have a new favorite autumn-y breakfast!

1 cut up apple, 2 tbs. of cinnamon/sugar mixture, any muesli you like. Add milk. Perfect in scent, texture, and taste. I’ve been eating this for breakfast for four days now. I’ll probably run to the farmer’s market tomorrow morning after uni to get some fresh peaches and use them instead of apples, just to mix things up a little.

Speaking of uni: it’s getting to be a little too much, and they’re doing their best not to help me. See, they introduced this new computer system over the summer, and now nothing is working. All the things that were supposed to make everyone’s lives easier are now more complicated than ever. But I don’t feel like getting into detail, it’ll just make me mad all over again. I had one exam last week, and as usual I had a pretty good feeling when I turned it in but now I’m pretty sure I did everything wrong and won’t pass, which would be nothing short of a catastrophe because it would be the definite nail into the Fifth Semester Abroad coffin. They handed out info packages last week about that fifth semester, including a list of partner unis that will likely take on students. I have to pick four, and will be notified before Christmas if I got in somewhere. But there are so many other issues at uni – courses I haven’t passed, exams I need to do again – that all fall into that fifth semester that I may end up having to stay here, anyway. More on that once I’ve made some decisions.

By the way, my laptop is back! Fixed and cleaned! It feels like an entirely new computer except that all my data could be saved! Which is just such good news, isn’t it. Turns out, the RAM was broken. Just quit working. I don’t know if that means anything to you; I didn’t even know that was a thing that could break. But whatever, it’s working again. And what do you know, I’m already feeling sleepier and more stressed and less excited about doing work for uni. It’s a little spooky that the laptop would have this kind of power over me but here we are. Here we are, indeed. I’M BACK BABY.