I’m such a goof, man. Is that a word that’s used in this context? It is now, motherEFFERS. (I would just like to point out that I learned this type of language from EmmySuh. Muahaha. ZING? Oh, I’m only kidding! Kinda.) I’m going home as early tomorrow morning as I can get my ass out of bed and I’ve been waiting for this for weeks and then this past week just crept along and wouldn’t end, and now it’s Friday night and what? I’m sad. Sad to leave Maastricht for as long as three weeks, sad to leave uni, sad to not see the people. Why do I always always ALWAYS want to be where I’m not? This is my biggest annoyance these days. It’s impossible to ignore, too. Ugh. Messed up, is what it is.

Why I’m sad:

• There’s always a certain nostalgia about leaving a place, right? And I think for some reason it’s stronger in me than it is in most others because, well, I assume no one else here would feel this melancholic about leaving a town for only three weeks? I don’t know. But that’s why I feel oddly sad right now.

• My expensive Canon SRL is apparently broken all of a sudden. I was taking pictures one minute, and the next thing I know is that pressing down that button to take pictures won’t work. The screen and everything works perfectly fine. It’s just that button, I think. UNNECESSARY BURDEN.

• There was this boy. In one of my classes. And there was only one meeting each week so in total there have only been three meetings or something over the course of ages and ages, it seems like. And I had gotten used to seeing him in that context. I’m not attracted to him in a WILL JUMP HIM way but – does anyone ever feel this way about people? That they’re just the best to be around but not in a best buds way or in a sexual attraction kinda way but something inbetween? Like, they’re funny and kind and smart and just so easy to be around? And happen to have THE MOST ADORABLE FRENCH ACCENT YOU COULD POSSIBLY IMAGINE? So. Okay. I would probably jump him for the accent alone. How could anyone resist someone who doesn’t pronounce the H at the beginning of a word? I ask you! It’s impossible not to just want to hug someone like that. (Or should I say ‘ug?) (Also, he’s from Belgium and black which I thought I’d just throw out there to get racist conspiracies a-brewin’. How dare you point out the color of his skin!, they’ll say. Or maybe not.) … This wasn’t supposed to be this long. I’m just sayin’. I’m sad that I won’t be around him for three weeks.

• This is a bit anti-climatic but: I have to clean my apartment once I finished up this entry and by “clean”, I mean scrub and vacuum all floors, dust, really clean the bathroom (for once!) and do a shit ton of dishes and basically get everything spring-cleaned within about fifty minutes tops. Not so thrilled about this.

Why I am happy:

• There was a meeting for this stupid ass class today that I had to repeat from last year, and it dealt with Nazi-Germany and this book by Daniel Goldhagen called Hitler’s Willing Executioners which basically says that all Germans, then and now and forever, are inherently culturally anti-Semitic. And some people in class – most of the class is Germans, I should add – got really upset about this because it is such an insane generalization. But I was really struck by how grown-up the whole debate ended up to be; how others from France and Poland and India and Finland offered there views on the whole thing. And, I don’t know. I guess I just really liked that meeting. It felt like what university is supposed to be like. People from different backgrounds and of different opinions debating important issues. Heh.

Also:

• Leaving the house at about 6.30am tomorrow morning to get on a bus and on another bus and then on a train and then on another train to be home after about seven hours of traveling. And stay home for three weeks all the way through Easter.

Happy weekend, folks!